Tips for Planning A Romantic, Relaxing Vacation

By Trish McDermott

There’s no such thing as an accidentally fabulous romantic vacation, as real romance requires not only love and commitment, but also good communication and even better advance planning. This is especially true for romantic getaways. The more details you can plan in advance, the more time and energy you’ll have to enjoy your partner’s company and milk your vacation for all the romance, memories and happily-ever-after possible.

Begin by deciding when to go, as your timing often dictates where you’ll go and what you’ll do. Pick a time away from work and other responsibilities that will provide a stress-free vacation for both of you. For example: Don’t plan a trip that pulls you away from something you’ll both regret missing, like a significant moment in your children’s lives, or a big family party or celebration.

Surprise romantic vacations can be wonderful, provided you’ve done enough sleuthing into your partner’s schedule to know that he or she can be whisked away with little consequence. Vacations that commemorate a special time in your relationship history — whether an anniversary, the day your last child leaves for college or a second honeymoon — begin on a romantically optimistic note and only get better as you go.

So, where to go? - Once you’ve decided when to go, spend some time discussing mutually ideal vacation spots. Remember that your goals for a romantic vacation are different than other vacations you’ve taken. Sight-seeing should be less important than relaxing and reconnecting. Warmer weather (think skimpy clothing and lazy afternoons in the sun) may be more appealing than cooler climates, and sunsets may offer more hand-holding opportunities than museum tours.

Cruises are a great way to reinvigorate the romance in your relationship because unlike other vacations, cruises are hassle-free from the moment you step onboard. On a cruise the fun is literally right around the corner, or up a deck or two. Whether you’re lavishing in a couple’s massage, spending private time on your balcony or enjoying a romantic dinner together, shared fun and relaxation is a catalyst for relationship magic.

As you pack, let your mind wander back to the days when you first fell in love. Pack as though you were vacationing together for the first time. Go a little sexier than you might on a typical vacation. Bring along a surprise gift and anything else (a special cologne or perfume, a favorite CD) that might enhance the mood.

If possible, arrange in advance to have a bouquet of flowers, or a chilled bottle of champagne, waiting in your room or cabin. Vacations that begin with thoughtful surprises set the stage for real connections. Consider bringing along other accoutrements of romance that don’t necessarily fit in a suitcase including a playful attitude; a desire to take risks and try new things; a great sense of humor; generosity, especially when unexpected; and a willingness to go the extra mile to please your partner.

Disconnect to Reconnect - When packing for a romantic vacation, remember to disconnect in order to reconnect. That means leaving your laptop, BlackBerry, cell phone and miscellaneous office paperwork behind. Likewise, relationship issues, resentments or misunderstandings are best left at the door. Finally, consider leaving your children with friends or family members. This vacation is about reconnecting with your partner through quality couple time. As much as you love your children, they create responsibilities that distract from your romance.

When the time comes to embark on your romantic vacation, be mindful of romantic settings that will help bring the two of you closer. Full moons, sunsets and even walks in the rain, followed by a cocktail sipped in a tropical setting, offer opportunities to quietly reconnect. Vast stretches of ocean, or the soothing sound of gentle waves lapping at the shore, will inspire romance.

Remember that romance is a state of mind, not a destination. Wherever you go, whatever you do, what’s really most meaningful about this vacation is the person you’ve brought along, the way you look into his or her eyes and the many times you reach for each other’s hand.